Vodka Time

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((Feb 12th. Afternoon. Bonding thread for the Benderman and Russia. Because reasons.))

A certian shiney metal bending unit was having his own private party out back the house. Bender kicked the back door open with a few items bunched under his arms. The robot took a small collection of whiskey bottles and a few old Playbot magazines to a special spot behind the house. It was unofficial robot break time and Bender had gathered all the essentials around a dumpy lawn chair that he set up for his own personal enjoyment. He made his way to his seat, whistleing She'll Be Coming 'Round the Mountian the whole time. After simply dropping the whiskey bottles and magazines on the ground, the robot jumped into the chair and reclined.

And that was the end of it; with booze in one hand and a tasteless article in the other, there was nothing that would convince the robot from doing work of any sort. It's Bender-time. An unamused look glazed his yellow eyes and he burried his face into the magzine. Hey, if it was going to be so boreing around, Bender was going to take advantage of the down time.

((bad post of epic))

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The Russian was perplexed. He had no clue what he was doing or where he was going. That probably wasn't a good sign. Perhaps he had a bit too much vodka last night? Whatever the reason he was there, he figured he could at least figure out where he was. He could tell it was an American city, but that was about it. Luckily for Russia, he was dressed in attire that was going to protect him from winter's wrath. He could probably wander around for hours without feeling cold.

But he didn't have time for wandering around aimlessly. So what did he do? Sneak into someone's backyard of course! What else would he do? Russia hid out in the bushes, watching someone do... absolutely nothing. Russia couldn't quite tell what said person was. It didn't seem human, as far as Russia could tell. Though, the Russian noticed some magazines and bottles lying around. He was so much more interested in the bottles, though. No longer in hiding, the towering male waltzed his way on over towards Bender.

"You know where I am, da?" he spoke up, hoping to catch the bending unit's attention. "You see, I woke up in weird place, and was wandering about until I found the nearest house. Then I noticed bottles lying around and found you, so I figured you must know something about where I am." Russia's violet hued eyes were scanning the bottles. Maybe he could snag a bottle of vodka, though it appeared that there was only whiskey. What a shame.

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Bender blinked once and dropped his porn magazine below his eye level, getting the vibe that someone wanted something out of him. Pixel eyes focused in on the man that was standing before him, although he needed to shift his gaze up to see his face. Bender tapped his fingers on the glass whiskey bottle he was clutching, not seeming to happy about being interupted when he was busy doing nothing. The robot figured that this was probably a new recuit. Insinctivly, yellows eyes breifly swifted beyond the Russian. Bender had been around long enough to know that new members usually appeared in bulk. But right now, it looked like this guy was alone. Good, maybe he could get back to his lazying about sooner.

Bender, deciding to be friendly (at least, his own special brand of "friendly") stood up from the lawn chair, placing his reading material on the ground as he did. The robot folded his arms over his chest and looked toward the house.

"Yeah sure, pal. We're a ways away from Chicago here," The robot stated, uninterest glazeing his tone, "There a ton of us all stuck here. We're supposed to be in this war thing workin' for this meat-bag who wants to take over the world."

A malicious look appeared in Bender's eyes as he remarked slyly:

"But some of us got a surprize for him, you know? Mwehehehe."

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The robot hadn't addressed that it was odd that Russia just popped up in the backyard. That was probably a good sign. Perhaps he just didn't care enough to notice it. Russia's violet eyes went from viciously scanning the bottles right to Bender when the robot addressed his presence. Chicago? Huh. Maybe Russia would run into America around here. Unless he was too busy chomping down on burgers and chugging down slushies like his life depended on it, it seemed likely to Russia that he'd be seeing America running around.

There were a ton of people stuck around Chicago? Huh. That seemed odd. Was America deep down sadistic and wanted slaves around? Or was this some other guy's doing? Russia assumed the latter. Apparently, this guy was a 'meat-bag' obsessed with taking over the world. The Russian contemplated on asking how this guy was a meat-bag, but something else the robot said caught his attention a lot more. A surprise. From that look in the robot's eyes, it seemed like something Russia would be very, very interested in.

"Oh, I do like surprises." Russia said with a childish tone, a smile beaming on his face. "Tell me, what is big surprise you have in mind?" At the moment, Russia seemed like a rather large kid. That attitude was likely to change into something far more sadistic in moments, though. Russia wasn't exactly known for being a normal, nice guy.

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If the evil plan had been his own (and Bender had not been kind of brainwashed at the moment), he probably wouldn't have been so eager to just out an spoil the plot. Right now, though, Bender assumed that his "masters" would appricate him converting as many men as possable to their cause. Almost kid-like himself, the robot wired his fingers together eagerly. Oh how proud the masters would be of him if he had swiftly swept this new member right to their cause. Besides, evil plotting was a favorite activity of the bending unit, so long as he wasn't busy doing nothing. Within a moment, his priorities switched from relaxation time, to conspireing. How delicious.

"Not me, d' masters," Bender explianed, gestureing a thumb to the house, even though he wasn't sure they were in there, "But mostly Dr.Facilier. Ya see, he's plannin' to take over the army of the old leader, and then we'll conquer the world. We already got a ton of people on our side, and plenty of them are my robot brothers! Soon, we're gonna have a hostile take over and once we get in charge, taking d' whole world is gonna be a peice a' cake. And once we're in charge, there's gonna be booze and hookerbots and casinos everywhere. Yeah - gonna be great."

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The Russian took a moment to let Bender's words sink in. Conquering the world? That didn't seem as if it were too difficult. After all, Russia was in control of the most land already. He could easily take the rest of the world. Then, all would finally be one with Russia. He could finally live somewhere warm with sunflowers if he could take over the world. Russia was pleased with this idea of taking over the world. The purple eyed human had a dark, twisted smirk on his face. "If I take over the world, all will be one with Russia. All will be one with Russia." he mused to himself.

The human thought back on what Bender said about what was going to happen once they took charge of the entire world. Hookerbots, booze, and casinos. Russia was a lot more interested in having vodka. Russia's odd, creepy smile melted away into a look of sincere joy. "I would very much like to join your cause. So long as there's vodka involved, I would like to be a part of this master plan." The Russian briefly noticed that neither he or the robot had introduced themselves to one another. No matter, names would probably be found out if Russia was allowed to join Dr. Facilier's army.

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Bender was either obivious the dark smirk the tall man displayed, or just used twisted villains by now. What currently mattered to him was converting this new arrival to the cause of the rebels. Actually, that seemed to be done and done sooner than he thought, given the instant approval the russian showed for the idea. Welp, that was easy. The less work Bender needed to do, the better. He must have been just THAT persuaive. No other robot is Falicier's army could match the greatness of Bender. Haha.

"Oh yeah, sure. We could get hold of some vodka easy. And I can introduce you to the big boss guy later."

The short robot fell quiet for only a moment before his obnoxious voice rose up again.

"Speaking of which, what do they call you, man?"

Getting the feeling that he might be getting aquainted to this guy for some time yet, Bender leaned back a bit, placing a plam on the house. After reaching into his chest compartment of magic, he took a cigar to his mouth and allowed it to hang there.

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This was going smoothly. Maybe waking up here wasn't so bad after all. He he was going to get vodka and someone wasn't terrified at the sight of him. Those were already wonderful signs that this place wouldn't be so bad, not to mention he was going to get to take over the world. Yet another plus. Then the topic of names came around. The Russian figured that it would be completely normal if he told the robot he was a country, unaware that it might be viewed as odd in this world. In his world, countries that were people were completely normal. Here, not so much.

"Me? I am Russia." the Russian responded to the question, a legitimate smile on his face as he answered. He was interested in how the robot just got out a cigar out of his chest, but asked nothing of it. Perhaps he was a magical creature who was just able to do that. "You've heard of Russia, da?" Well, who hadn't heard of Russia? It was a huge country. If you looked at a world map of countries, it's likely one of the first countries you'd find.

Unless you were like America, and your world map was just the country of America.

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Bender lifted a brow upon hearing this man's name. As he went on, Bender was pretty sure this guy was convinced he was actually a landmass. The bending unit wasn't exactly geographically inclined, but he was pretty sure that's what the large human ment. The gave a rather awkward pause before taking a quick drag on his cigar and the blowing out a small ploom of blueish smoke. He removed his hand from the house and stood up striaght again, meanwhile flicking some ash of the end of the cigar.

"Well, I'm Bender, baby!"

He offered a hand, as if he wanted a handshake, but quickly drew it away to brush off his shoulder.

"I come from d' far future. I sorta got stuck here, but since I started workin' for the master, it ain't that bad."

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The violet eyed male glanced at Bender's hand. For a moment, he contemplated on shaking it, but when the bending unit had drawn it away to brush off his shoulder, Russia kept his gloved hands at his sides. The robot came from the future? And his name was Bender? The Russian was at least a bit intrigued at this concept. He was also rather surprised the robot didn't really care about his name. Then again, Russia wasn't going to be asking why a robot was named Bender. Maybe things were really odd in the future, one example being names. It hit Russia that he might get a bit more popularity if he went by another name. People around here might give him odd looks if he went by Russia. OK, they'd give him even more odd looks. He was already considered creepy and odd around most.

"You can call me Ivan instead. It's a bit shorter, and not so extraordinary, da? Easier to remember." With that subject off his mind, Russia continued speaking. "You come from the future? What is it like there?"